Maybe I should just stop turning


I‚Äôll try to¬†stay as¬†objective and¬†respectful as¬†possible because I¬†know this topic might make some people feel some type of¬†way. Plus I¬†don‚Äôt want this to¬†get me in¬†trouble at¬†home. I¬†think it’s one of¬†those things people notice but never mention, well at¬†least the¬†fellas. It used to¬†be every guy‚Äôs thing, but lately I’ve been feeling like I‚Äôm the¬†only one who‚Äôs giving up on¬†this great habit while every other man walking the¬†face of¬†the¬†earth is having the¬†time of¬†his life, breaking his neck like never before.

My¬†boy turned 5 months not too long ago but I¬†still remember the¬†day he was born like it was yesterday. This made me realize that before I¬†know it I¬†will need to¬†have “the¬†man talk” with him and¬†teach him the¬†perfect balance between respect and¬†sexuality. This also got me reminiscing about the¬†day I¬†looked at¬†him for¬†the¬†first time and¬†whispered to¬†myself “gad kijan m’ sove”, thinking about how I¬†probably escaped the¬†popular myth “se vakabon ki f√® pitit fi”. I¬†know danm well I¬†wasn‚Äôt a¬†saint. Looking back at¬†it was my¬†thing.

Now, I¬†can‚Äôt even remember the¬†last time I¬†turned. The¬†few seconds of¬†ultimate viewing pleasures used to¬†hit the¬†spot every time but a¬†while ago I¬†realized how the¬†hypnotizing bounce goes straight into the¬†forgotten files in¬†your memory as¬†she fades into the¬†crowd like an¬†apparition. Yes, people I‚Äôm talking about ASS! Yup, a¬†woman’s butt!

You would think it‚Äôs programmed into every man’s brain to¬†automatically and¬†discretely follow a¬†woman’s butt with his eyes as¬†she walks by. We just can’t help it. Even when walking with the¬†“chosen” one, we won’t even shame ourselves into not using the¬†oldest trick in¬†the¬†book: “Babe, look at¬†this girl’s butt… wow!! That‚Äôs just too big right?” No matter what, knowing danm well it will get us in¬†trouble, we just have to¬†see what her mama gave her. When the¬†woman in¬†question has mastered the¬†“walk”, you know the¬†walk that makes it jiggle, the¬†feeling is even more orgasmic which of¬†course has you contemplating about what you should, could, or¬†would do, if and¬†only if… but let’s be honest, the¬†rule is clear and¬†we all respect it: “you can look, but you CAN NOT TOUCH”.

The¬†sad truth is we all know it‚Äôs not automatic. We’re just all poor victims of¬†great marketing strategies! This crime against us is actually premeditated, a¬†well-organized trap or¬†as¬†the¬†youngings would call it a¬†‚Äúthirst trap‚ÄĚ. After the¬†long makeup sessions, most women if not all always take a¬†quick glance at¬†their cakes before walking away from the¬†mirror, to¬†make sure the¬†jeans, dress, leggings or¬†whatever they’re wearing is hugging, lifting and¬†shaping them just right!

I‚Äôll take this opportunity to¬†make this public service announcement to¬†the¬†ladies: if a¬†guy (most of¬†them) had the¬†choice he would rather see a¬†woman’s butt before her face (please notice how said “He would rather see it first then complete the¬†admiration with her face”). For¬†those of¬†you wondering, yes your brain and¬†personality count just as¬†much but they come a¬†little later during the¬†process! I¬†think we can all agree that if you asked a¬†guy why he loves his wife and¬†his answer was ‚Äúbecause she’s the¬†smartest woman I‚Äôve ever met‚ÄĚ, you wouldn‚Äôt really believe him. For¬†some reason, ‚ÄúShe‚Äôs the¬†most beautiful woman I‚Äôve ever seen‚ÄĚ is a¬†more believable answer. It’s actually by¬†law, the¬†law of¬†attraction that is.

I¬†think most women are in¬†on¬†the¬†secret by¬†now: ‚ÄúThe¬†best way to¬†a¬†man‚Äôs heart is through his eyes‚ÄĚ. It’s all about how well you present the¬†complete package. Unfortunately some women(some men too) focus so much on¬†the¬†presentation that they completely forget about the¬†content.

When plastic surgery became accessible and¬†affordable to¬†the¬†masses, the¬†demand was for¬†facial feature enhancements, reducing the¬†appearance wrinkles and¬†old age, breast augmentations and¬†liposuction. But that was then. Now the¬†requests are different. The¬†“hour glass” flipped and¬†women are no longer worried about stopping their clock or¬†looking younger. The¬†focus has shifted from their face to¬†their body, more specifically to¬†their lower body. It‚Äôs all about who has the¬†best slim waist to¬†fat ass ratio and¬†the¬†best “slim thick” body.

Although a¬†man turning to¬†look at¬†a¬†woman’s butt may seem like a¬†silly gesture to¬†some, this simple gesture is responsible for¬†a¬†billion dollar industry. This new trend has been the¬†cause of¬†multiple deaths, imprisonments, breakups and¬†divorces. Now don‚Äôt get all technical here and¬†tell me ‚Äúoh, it‚Äôs not about guys just turning‚Ķ‚ÄĚ. I¬†am well aware of¬†the¬†details and¬†variables trust me! But if you add it all up, from the¬†lifters, the¬†butt pads, the¬†shots, the¬†fat transfers, the¬†waist trainers and¬†so on‚Ķ.

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But pad

Butt pad

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Fat transfer

Fat transfer

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…it all comes down to women looking good and men appreciating their curves.
‚ÄúThirst trapping‚ÄĚ is no longer something that happens once in¬†a¬†while on¬†a¬†sidewalk. With social media, where everything ¬†is exhibited and¬†glamourized with filters, perfect angles, photo editing apps etc, anyone can find this great pleasure (which used to¬†be serendipitous) at¬†any given time by¬†a¬†simple scroll down their timeline. For¬†men like myself who were fortunate enough to¬†experience the¬†real ¬†pleasure of¬†watching an¬†all natural woman leave, the¬†fantasy stopped. I¬†got in¬†on¬†their secret and¬†acquired the¬†unfortunate skill of¬†spotting Dr Shahine works from the¬†Almighty‚Äôs. The¬†disappointment couldn‚Äôt have been greater. It was like the¬†moment when a¬†child realized Santa Claus didn‚Äôt really exist. Yes, you still exchange gifts every Christmas (in¬†this case you’d see them all the¬†time) but the¬†excitement is simply not the¬†same. My¬†dreams were crushed and¬†it was killing me inside. Every time I¬†saw one (mostly the¬†ones you can tell they have a¬†fatty from the¬†front) the¬†anticipation was no longer on¬†the¬†reveal of¬†the¬†masterpiece but more on¬†the¬†disappointment to¬†come. So I¬†found myself turning less and¬†less.

Honestly I stopped turning as often as I used to because I was lucky enough to call one of those complete packages my own and the pleasure just was not there anymore. I guess I  grew out of it.

To¬†all the¬†‚Äúass man‚ÄĚ out there who still turn every time, just know that I¬†miss those days when we used to¬†catch each other in¬†the¬†act and¬†smile with the¬†head nod meaning “you saw that too bro‚ÄĚ.

Sincerely, an¬†‚Äúass man‚ÄĚ.

Let’s be respectful, but please tag or¬†share this with 1 or¬†5 women you know with an¬†amazing butt let them know they’re appreciated.



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